James “Jay” Wilson

Jay was born on March 1, 1962 in Elizabethtown, Kentucky, and passed away on February 15th, 2022, in Kansas City, Missouri.

Jay was full of life and everyone who met him and spent any time with him, knows the joy he brought into their lives.

Jay had a passion for cooking, seldom following a recipe completely and loved having dinner parties trying new dishes for everyone to taste.

He loved watching all sports, and following his graduation from University of Kentucky, followed the basketball team every year.

Every year Jay would plan out several trips traveling the globe exploring new places and tasting the local foods.

His caring soul came through for his love of animals.  Wherever he was, animals would circle around him wanting his attention.  His beloved cat Bucky helped Jay get through some difficult health issues and was always by his side.

With his love for cooking, Jay never missed an opportunity to entertain, hosting Derby parties every year, every holiday there was a party, or just a spontaneous happy hour out on the deck to bring friends and family together.

Jay was also an avid gardener and loved creating beautiful pots of flowers and herbs all along the deck and yard.  Jay’s green thumb was an inspiration to us all.

Survivors include: husband, Ken Millsap; sisters & brothers-in-laws, Anne & Brent Aubrey,  Beth & TimWhalen and Gail Wilson; Jay’s in laws, Ann & Monte Shaw; nieces, Audrey Whitesides, Kristin Littrell (Jacob) and Kelsey Petrosky (Daniel) and nephews, Josh Markham, and Luke Whitesides.

Memorial service will be held on March 23rd at 3:00 pm at Unity Temple on the Plaza

Memorial contributions may be made:

In Jay Wilson name-

Wayside Waifs, Kansas City, Missouri and The Garden Fairies at Unity Temple on the Plaza, Kansas City, Missouri.

Visits: 3


  1. Lonni on February 22, 2022 at 9:01 am

    Jay was an amazing joy -humble, smart, funny, droll, wonderful creative chef and host. We had many “adventures” together, given my sense of direction and his dislike of driving -such as getting lost in a snowstorm where Beth lived and Jay suggesting we just park the car and get a taxi (we did manage to get back to our hotel); or the time we got lost in Dallas and Jay urgently advising to leave the area we were in but had no idea how to get back except for Jay guiding us by the position of the sun. And the cooking! Being his “helpers” and doing it just right was great fun.
    He loved college basketball and was so excited when UCONN was finally making it up the ranks. Jay was the first I would call to discuss their progress.
    Jay loved being with his friends and with his husband, Ken.They were great partners for each other- they created a beautiful, welcoming homes together. I still have Bucky’s photo in a frame on my bookshelf. I loved living with them in Philly together (another source of great adventures.) Jay will be missed but he lives on in my heart and memories.

  2. Bob Vollmert on February 22, 2022 at 5:25 pm

    Jay was a great person and a wonderful and generous friend. I first met him in the late 1980’s and we remained close friends until the end. We traveled together and shared mutual interests. Jay loved cooking and get togethers at Jay and Ken’s house in Kansas City were culinary and social highlights for many of us. Jay was well read and an inspiration to me and many others. His passing has left a huge sense of loss for me. I loved Jay and pray that he rests in peace!

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